The first time I visited Dubai, every tour organiser told me to see the Dubai Mall, the biggest mall in the world, and the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building globally. What they didn’t mention was the dancing fountain, located between the Dubai Mall and the Burj Khalifa.
The fountain is free for everyone; they have a show of the dancing water following a tune and some songs. After every hour, hundreds of people will surround the fountain and enjoy the show. Most of us immediately pull out our phones to record the show for the first time.
An hour later, I came back for the second show. Then, in a few minutes, something that made me go deeper into thought happened. Everyone in front of me pulled out their phones to record the dancing fountain. We did this instead of watching it live, even though it was the same show as an hour ago.
The first-time experience and excitement to record the show was okay. The second time doing that was an awakening for me. That meant we were watching the show on screen while it was right there in front of us.
But that shows the reality today: we record everything but remember nothing. We connect with everyone but don’t belong anywhere. We are reachable, yet we feel more distant.
You can type a full name of anyone in the world and you can reach them on their social media. You can view their profile and even text or call them. But after reaching out, you realise there is nothing more you can talk about or connect with. You end up realising the person on social media is not as cool as the real person you are interacting with.
With the pressure to look cool and happy on social media, we create a second personality. The one that is within easy reach, observed, and in the spotlight. We then hide our true selves, the real personality that is the foundation of our entire existence. The more people connect with the fake personality, the more we hide the true one.
We nurture a personality that joins WhatsApp groups, posts statuses, and responds to texts and calls. This personality hides feelings, struggles, fears, emotions, trauma, and life challenges. And since everyone is doing that, we accumulate years of things to hide.
We give in to social media’s algorithm machine. We post funny, interesting content that’s easy for people to react to with comments and likes. It’s normal for someone to say “good morning” in response to the memes you posted on WhatsApp instead of texting you directly. And if you don’t post anything, no one remembers your existence.
I know you might be deeper into that mess. Likely, you might be so addicted to what you are doing, already in thousands of WhatsApp groups and meme nations. But learn to pause, reflect, and check if the relationship you are having with people is as I elaborate.
If most of the people in your conversation start and end with your statutes and posts on social media, then you have a problem. If the people in your call log or recent visits wouldn’t take you to hospital when you’re sick or help in an emergency, then you have a problem.
It is okay to be more accessible; ensure you do not become distant during that process by allowing your phone to manage the difficult tasks. It was easier for me to move across people to enjoy the fountain show live than pull out my phone and act like everyone.
Learn to call people and have conversations with them for hours. Learn to meet people for tea or coffee and food to have face-to-face conversations. Learn to go out for a walk without recording anything. Experience things in real time. Don’t feel pressured to record or put a screen between you and your moments.
Stop recording and start experiencing.
May you be happy,
May you be healthy,
May you be free from sufferings
May you find peace and joy
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#iThinkSo
Rogers Katuma
Financial Artist, Senior Adventurer, Occasional Storyteller and an Amateur Golfer
