I have always drawn a lot of lessons from playing football. The lessons came from different sources. Some came from the coaches and their experiences. Others were from team-mates during conversations. Most of what I learned, though, came from my own observations.
I have played a thousand football matches in my life. One game where I learned a lot was a semi-final in a very competitive league that our team was part of. The team had four star players who were delivering the most during that tournament; I was one of them.
We all started the game, but I was the only one who finished the entire ninety minutes. The other three suffered some of the things that taught me valuable lessons in life.
The first star player, who was the captain of our team, was the best at what he does. But his weakness was that he hated exercises, training, and warm-ups. The coach did his best to push him to the limits, but he always found ways to cheat or skip them. In this game, it was the same. While we did our warm-ups, he was either hiding, chatting with fans, or making excuses.
At the start of the game, it had a strong tempo and intensity. A few minutes in, the captain received a great pass in a scoring position. The pass was a bit far from him to protect it from the defenders. He had to sprint and stretch to reach it. I would bet my life he could reach the pass, see the goalkeeper, score, and then run to the corner to perform his favourite dance celebration.
That day was not today, as he tried to sprint and stretch; his body failed him. He strained his hamstrings and fell down like a bag of potatoes, and there went our best chance to lead. The pain in his eyes revealed everything. He was out of the match and even the tournament. Our captain failed to take care of himself, and he let the entire team down that day.
He was then replaced by an average player who wasn’t ready to compete in such a high-pressure game. It was even worse that he had to fill the shoes of the star player of the team. The substitution was bound to fail from the start.
Our second star player was one of the fittest and most physical creatures I have ever seen. He was the one the teacher picked for training drills. He chose him when he needed a demonstration or a benchmark for others to beat. The biggest weakness of this guy was anger issues; a simple provocation would lead to a war (literally).
It took him twenty minutes and three attempted tackles on him to lose his nerve. He punched the defender of the opposite team, and the referee gave him a straight red card. We lost our second star player and had to play outnumbered for over an hour in a tense match.
Our third star player was the nicest person in the entire team. His sweetness, caring nature, and love earned him the role of assistant captain for the team. He was more composed and calm on the pitch than anyone else. You could stab him in the chest while dribbling, and he would get up, patch the bleeding, and smile at you.
Physically, he was not the best in the team, but you would never put him in a group of lazy players. He would do the drills the coach required. He also organised his personal training and workouts outside the team. He took care of himself.
The biggest challenge for this player was handling pressure from fans and their expectations. It was easy for this stress to get into his head. He needed a lot of time for pep talks, encouragement, and reminders to do his best.
With the team captain injured and replaced by a regular, things went downhill. Our second star player got a red card. Our third-best player started feeling the pressure. He started worrying about his performance and the words of the fans got to him. If you saw him play football that day, you might think he should find a new career. Saying his performance was horrible is an understatement.
By half-time, the coach had to take out the third star player. He hoped the rest of us, along with the average guys, could still do something. After the half-time meeting, the coach shared wise words: “Take care of yourself so you can care for others.”
A very simple sentence but with deep meaning and a heavy burden. He said our star player didn’t warm up adequately. Because of that, he let us all down when he got injured.
The second star player let his anger get the best of him. This led to a red card and left us playing with one fewer player for over an hour. The third star player didn’t manage his mindset well. He gave in to pressure and the team had to take him out of the game. That left me.
For the rest of the second half, I must avoid injuries, red cards, and the pressure from fans. If I do that on my part, then I will take care of everyone else. I had to step up when the situation was critical.
The game ended with a narrow win on our side. It was a team effort type of goal, but it had my touch in every movement. The coach was proud of how I handled the situation, and he promoted me to team captain. The best reward from that experience was knowing that “if I take care of myself, then I can take care of others.”
It’s a simple concept that is practical in all walks of life. If you manage your finances well, then you can provide financial support to your loved ones. If you take care of your emotions, then you will be able to be there for those in emotional need. If you are healthy and fit, you will be able to take care of the sick and wounded.
Learn to keep your affairs in order to be able to help your loved ones. That is not being selfish; it is the practical way to be there for your loved ones. Being able to deliver when needed requires you to do the work by yourself so that you can do all the work for others.
Work hard, build your career and succeed in life so that you can have the tools and resources to help others. Build your home and relationships to be in a great space where you can help other people’s relationships. Be calm, happy and content on your own so that you can be the best company, friend or neighbour to anyone who comes to you.
Think of this as a half-time pep talk for your life. The coach says, “Take care of yourself so you can care for others.”
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be free from suffering.
May you find peace and joy.
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Rogers Katuma
Financial Artist, Senior Adventurer, Occasional Storyteller and an Amateur Golfer
