When I started university, I set a goal. I wanted to have a car by the time I graduated in my third year. It was either a blue Altezza or a red Toyota Celica. I managed to buy the red Toyota Celica a month before my graduation, so it was something special to me.

The first time you own or experience something, it can change your life. My first car is a cherished memory. Even now, I smile when I remember that first ride from ten years ago. I treated the first car as if it were my first relationship with a girl.

A few months after getting the car, I visited my father in Arusha. I wanted to enjoy a road trip and make the most of my new car. Before that, I had only taken a few trips and stayed in traffic jams most of the time. That seven-hundred-kilometre road trip gave me a different experience with my car.

When I reached home, I found a young innocent boy whom I had never known. He was so excited to see the car that he decided to stay outside the entire time while all of us were inside. I recalled a time when I felt like him. I loved seeing other people’s cars and dreamed of having my own. I decided to surprise him.

I wanted him to feel closer to the car. 

I parked the car at the corner, facing forward. This way, when I wanted to leave, I would be heading straight out. Also, it was a nice spot near the tap where someone could wash the car. I handed over the keys to the kid and told him to wash the car. The smile and twinkle in his eyes melted my heart. I disappeared inside with nothing to worry about.

A few minutes later, we all heard a loud noise from outside, and we were all shocked. It felt like something huge and heavy had smashed into the wall. We all rushed outside to figure it out. I was heartbroken the moment I reached out.

There was some smoke behind my car; that young kid was inside the car. That said, the kid tried to move the car and crashed it into the wall; what a way to be welcomed home. I was mature enough to first rush to the kid and ask him if he was okay; he could not answer.

I saw that he was physically fine, but I knew it would take him some time to feel emotionally stable after what he did. But I could not stop myself from asking a lot of questions.

I understand you wanted to move the car, but why did you go backwards while you were near the wall? 

And why did you choose to go backwards while the car was facing the front, straight to the gate? 

Why did you even want to move the car to start with?

All my questions had no answers; he could not respond, and no one understood the kid. He has never driven a car before; he had never done something like that before. I told him I’ve forgiven him. Then, I asked him to finish washing the car. I also offered to teach him some driving in the next few weeks. 

The relief that came to his face made me feel that I had made the wise decision. If I hadn’t, I’m sure that would have ended the kid’s time there. They would have taken him back to the village.

As I walked inside, I wondered why anyone would go back when they were closer to the wall, especially with so much space ahead. My only explanation was that he did not know what he was doing. 

Then, I thought about how often I go back to my childhood. I remembered how my parents treated me, and it still makes me feel sad. A terrible childhood experience affected me deeply. It still brings trauma today.

Then I realised we all go back to the back even if there is nothing there. And we do not just go to the back; we go there and find something that will crush us just like the kid crushing the car. We go to find things from the past that come back to haunt us in the present. And that is like tripping on things that are behind us.

We remember when no one liked us or paid attention. It makes us sad. We worry that people still don’t like us or notice us. We spoil our present by focusing on the past, like tripping over something behind us.

We look back to our childhood and recall our struggles and hardships. Then, we carry those memories into the present, feeling like victims or unlucky. And we keep on living in the present with a lot of excuses for something that happened in the past. That is tripping over something that is behind us.

Using logic, we see that going back to the past to bring something bad or negative to the present is silly. It can affect our mood, plans, feelings, and reactions. For that kid, the excuse was that he was dumb and immature to reverse the car that was near the wall. 

For you and me, what excuse do we have if we do the same?

Don’t trip over things that are behind you, my friend.

#iThinkSo

May you be happy.

May you be healthy.

May you be free from suffering.

May you find peace and joy.

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Rogers Katuma

Financial Artist, Senior Adventurer, Occasional Storyteller, Amateur Golfer, Baby Pianist, and Rookie Chessman.