My grandmother, the dad’s mother, passed away a few years ago at the age of one hundred and three. One year before her death, she was paralyzed on her left side, so she spent it inside as she could not move. The story becomes fascinating because she won a court case a week before she was paralyzed.
The case was about some farms and plots that she owned in Kigamboni. Another old neighbour said they owned some plots and farms that were my grandmother’s. They were the two oldest and earliest settlers of the area when it was still a forest. When they settled in that area, there were no markers, title deeds, or contracts. The rule was whoever came to the place first claimed it to be theirs.
When that place became a town and plots sold for good money, they both started selling them. I remember my grandma involving her last-born son in that business. They even convinced me to buy a plot close to her home; I did.
The court ruled that my grandma was the rightful owner of the plots in the case with her neighbour. The old neighbour accepted the verdict. However, he said something our whole family will never forget. He said, “You won the plot, but you will lose something more important.”
And as the story unfolded, she became paralyzed a week after that threat. And she suffered for an entire year before her death. And all the times that I visited her she never showed any joy. She never wanted to talk about her plots, farms, nor the case she won. She had some possessions, but she had no joy in them.
Some of her children were eyeing the properties intently. They told her to her face that if her properties were so important, then they should take care of her.
Since her paralysis, she needed help with everything. This included eating, using the toilet, showering, changing clothes, and opening doors and windows for fresh air. And they were the only ones available for that.
I felt sorry for her. And the family did not want to sell any of their properties so as to take care of her better. They felt like her time was up and life had to move on. Her wish came true. On 28th August, early in the morning, she died in her sleep, surrounded by a sense of calm. I’m still thinking about the threat she got: “You won the plot, but you’ll lose something more important.”
She won the plots, but she lost her health, joy, and now her life.
Did that old neighbour have anything to do with this?
Was it a coincidence?
Well, it is a mystery and it will remain a mystery. We proceeded with the burial ceremony, and they appointed me to read her eulogy. I made it short, fun, and relatable, something that my grandmother was.
Now a few months have passed since my grandma passed away, and someone made a case. Before her passing, she sold me a plot of land. It included her youngest child and a local government representative on the papers. There were some issues. An old neighbour claimed it was his plot. He said he bought it from my grandmother a few years ago and had all the documents.
I was shocked at first, but then I realised that things always come full circle. I lost interest in following up on the plots; my mother felt I was being irresponsible and careless. She asked me about the documents and details and took charge.
She placed markers on the plot and found the local government official who signed the papers. She then asked all family members if they knew whether my grandma sold it to another person.
She spent like two months focusing on that, but the evidence that the old neighbour had was strong too. I told my mother to stop and let it go; she accepted with disappointment. I lost the plot, but I kept my joy. I did not want to end like my grandmother, to win the property and lose something more important.
Her death had a deep life lesson, especially how she finished it. There was a time she was the one with the most plots and farms around Kigamboni, Dar es Salaam. To put it into perspective, five out of ten people in her entire area bought their land from her. But with all those resources and access, she lost her joy.
Those plots weren’t even used properly to care for her when she needed help and resources the most.
Nowadays I am sensitive about what I possess. I analyze whether it will bring me more joy or rob me of my joy.
My grandmother lost that joy at one hundred and three. I’m starting my thirties. You weren’t at my grandmother’s eulogy. I told everyone there that the secret to a long life is finding joy without possessions.
If she were alive, she could have said the same. What is the value of possessions without joy?
#iThinkSo
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be free from suffering.
May you find peace and joy.
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Rogers “Ronn Dinero” Katuma
Chieftain and Financial Artist
Mphami Estate
